House Trained Mule

Everyone goes on about house training dogs, cats and kids but what about mules?  We are capable of it you know!  Honestly I think sometimes humans underestimate us.....

I am fully house-trained and trustworthy and leave all of my mule’s gold in neat little piles far away from my bed and food; they are always ready for collection by the chamber maid (aka FH).  Those boys next door make an amazing mess for poor FH every morning; anyone would think they have no manners?  But then I guess they are boys right?  I am the most popular mule ever with my tidy toilet habits.  My bed stays immaculate and I go through fewer shavings than a hamster.  There are occasions when I am not so perfect though.... when it’s driving rain and wind I do resort to the indoor facilities as I don’t like to get my delicate self wet, I’m sure you understand?

My aim is coming along nicely!

The only problem is that the humans STILL won’t let me in the house.... boo!  They don’t think there is such a thing as a kitty mule litter tray..... hmmm well I been thinking and maybe a bucket will do?

So I’m practicing my aim in the bucket in the hope that the humans will let me indoors.... after all what could be better than sharing your house with a pretty, dainty, house trained mule? 

Come on humans show some heart you know you’d like me curled up on the sofa in front of the fire :with you, I'm pretty small really :-)

The Power of Poo

Poo collection essentials!

OK so poo, plop, dung, poop, pony apples or whatever you like to call it is an odd subject to post on but boy is it important!  

There is one certainty in the Muleteer house, even more certain than the sun shining or the birds singing…. There will always be poo to pick up!  We Muleteers are always happy to keep FH’s poo bucket topped up and keep her physically exercised with all the collecting.  FH reckons we produce about 25-40 kg of poo a day between us and boy does she go on about it!

Even Catanian gets in on the act as she likes to help FH collect up the poo, generally her role is to stand on FHs feet whilst she is trying to pick up poo, her tool of choice are the ‘pink poo gloves’, on special occasions she may even bring out the ‘purple poo gloves’ – such glamour.

But we have been busy reminded FH of the benefits of poo…. Have you seen our muck heap of late?

Look at those lovely courgettes that are growing there.  Aren’t they a lovely colour?  The humans like to eat these and they grow ever so well in the ‘rotted’ section of the heap. 

We have also got some squash growing there too who are threatening to take over the whole heap like triffids!  They will be ready in the autumn, yum can’t wait, we quite like squash.

The other side of the heap is taken up with the ‘active’ stuff.  This is all our poo and bedding and greenery that needs to rot for a while.  We have one half rotting and the other half rotted. 

The rotting side is all thanks to our wiggly friends – we have billions of them.  Apparently they are otherwise known as worms.  They seem to love our presents and have a lovely time living in the heap where it's always nice and warm.

The heap is also home to grass snakes, slow worms, toads, at least three blackbirds and a multitude of other critters, whoever would have known poo could be this important?

Our poo is also good for making friends….. strange you may say but true we promise.  Every Spring and Autumn we have a ‘Mule’s Gold’ giveaway where the local gardeners come and take away the rotted half (after it’s finished giving its courgettes and squash).  These lovely folk enjoy viewing the ‘producers’ as any fussy customer should and they are always pleased to know that just good natural ingredients goes in to this heap.   They go away smiling with bags of Mule’s Gold which is nicely rotted and makes their garden grow, they always seem to come back for more so it must be good stuff.

So there you have it, the old English saying ‘Where there’s muck there’s brass (meaning money to those not from British background J)’ might not be entirely true but in this house ‘Where there’s poo there’s power’ just might be.

Miaow! FH come back here, you’ve missed a bit!