Ode to the Mule Rider

Greetings Muleteers!  Callie here, oh my mule what a lovely weekend I've been having, MH is back so my heart is mended.  He has brought me treats and scratches every day and apparently the humans have an extra couple of days off for the Queen's Jubilee!

With all the time for catching up on the latest news FH has very kindly been sharing one of her books with me. It is called The Natural Superiority of Mules, well what a brilliant book - I love it!  It is all about how great us long ears are and there's even a poem in the book that goes a little something like this....

ODE TO THE MULE RIDER

When you are tense, let me teach you to relax
When you are short tempered, let me teach you to see
When you are quick to react, let me teach you to be thoughtful
When you are angry, let me teach you to be respectful
When you are self absorbed, let me teach you to think of greater things
When you are arrogant, let me teach you humility
When you are lonely, let me be your companion
When you are tired, let me carry the load
When you need to learn, let me teach you.
After all, I am your mule

(Anon)

Now I really like this poem but do think it needs a little bit of tweaking....

When you are tense, let me teach you that yes that is a fire breathing, dragoncow in the hedge and we need to leave NOW - in the opposite direction at top speed!
When you are short tempered, let me teach you that us mules can wait all day... what's the rush?
When you are quick to react, let me teach you that I am quicker and kick harder and faster!
When you are angry, let me teach you the value of laughter, yes my bottom really does need scratching right there, and no I am not too big to sit in your lap!
When you are self absorbed, let me shatter your silence with a neighbray, it's always time for breakfast, even at 5am!
When you are arrogant, let me teach you that I am much better at gate latches, knots and getting through gaps than you and that no you can't get one over on me, I always know what you're up to!
When you are lonely, come see us, we're always pleased to see you and will always make you smile.
When you are tired, let me squash that poo deep in to the bed, roll in the biggest patch of mud and run through the electric fence!
When you need to learn, stick around we'll teach you.
After all you are our human!




Well muleteers hope you enjoyed my little poem.  Of course I wouldn't dream of doing these things (most of the time...) but sometimes you humans need a little reminder of the deal :-)

I'm off for a snooze now, FH and I have been touring the local area educating the tourists on mule manners and I'm a little weary... until next muleteers...... now then where is Queen Callie's crown and throne for these celebrations??