Wednesday, 9 May 2012

Mules are Like Marmite!


Greetings Muleteers!!  Ro-Land here, for once I have stolen the keyboard from my long eared pals and they are ‘allowing’ me to blog, aren’t I lucky J

Female Human (FH) and I went out for a little walk yesterday just the two of us and we were talking about Marmite (which I am partial to on toast).  FH was telling me about a phrase that some mule people use ‘Mules Are Like Marmite’ – you love ‘em or hate ‘em!  Now I have to say I think the ‘hate’ statement is a little too much but it did make me grin and then I had to think about this…, Strangely FH is always getting asked why she has mules but no one ever asks why she has me (it must be because I’m perfect?).  FH generally smiles and says it’s because we know a very well kept secret!!  

So it brings me back to Marmite.....  Why do we love ‘em or hate ‘em and why do I think they’re the best pals FH and I could wish for?  Well here’s my run down of the good, the bad and in some cases the downright ugly!!  FH helped me a little bit with the big words…..

The ‘Bad’ Bits (always start on the ‘bad’ news)

1/.  Fight first then Flight

Mules have a highly developed fight instinct (from their donkey father) as well as a flight instinct (I’m a racehorse in training you know!).  This means that you can get one or the other or both in a split second.  In general mules will put up much more of a ‘fight’ about something that they don’t perceive in their best interests; worming , injections and foot trimming are tasks that some mules find challenging, it takes lots of training and patience to get them over their fight instinct as FH has discovered.  The phrase ‘kicks like a mule’ is no accident; mules have fantastic aim and timing and if they feel they need to let you know they’re not happy then best watch out! 

2/. Self Preservation

Mules will not do what they don’t want to, you have to work with a mule to let them decide it’s what THEY want to do otherwise you’re in for a long wait or a big fight.  Self preservation is often misinterpreted as stubbornness...  I always follow the example of the long ears as they generally know best, if The Mini says run I follow!

3/. Difficult to Train


This is definitely true!!  Mules are more challenging to train as they question you and always ask the question ‘are you sure?’ and ‘what’s in it for me?’  They will definitely know if you’re scared of them, scared about something or you’re not in the right frame of mind (don’t go there...).  If you don’t understand their nature they’ll run rings around you and will make you look silly, generally while you’re red faced and swearing at the top of your voice that you ‘knew mules were stubborn’!!  Sometimes a short ear is just a little more angelic J

4/. Mules can’t do what horses do

WRONG!  They can do everything that us short ears can do and if you listen to the smarty pants here they reckon they’re better.  However, they will never have the speed of the Thoroughbred (or a Shetland pony in training) but sure do get the endurance of the donkey, combine the two and you have speed and endurance and boy can they jump. 

5/. Practicalities 

Mules are difficult to fit tack to, tacking up Dragon is a lengthy affair…. Her flat back and slightly different gait means she needs special gear which is neither cheap nor easy but FH doesn’t seem to mind.
Finding mule friendly vets, farriers and help can also be difficult.  It takes a bit of trial and error to find the right folks to help, The Mini has been ‘through’ a number of vets and farriers until he found two he likes, I followed his lead and behaved accordingly by standing on my back legs for two of them!

6/. Unpredictability

I think the better saying about mules would be ‘Mules are like a box of chocolates.... you never know what you’re gonna get’!  There are some days when my pals will be monsters for no apparent reason, call it an identity crisis, who knows?  Mules can be prone to having days when nothing is going right or when it’s not worth having the discussion, FH calls these ‘Mule Moments’ and shrugs and walks away.  If you want to have mule pals this is just something you have to accept and get on with, long and short ears are allowed duvet days too you know.

The Good Points

1/.  Loyalty

Mules are incredibly loyal and tend to become very bonded to their humans and pals.  The Mini took ages to overcome his fear of humans but is now the most loyal equine I have ever seen; if FH says ‘jump’ he’ll say ‘how high?’  The Mini follows FH around like a lost puppy and sulks when she leaves him, I am starting to see Dragon doing the same thing to, they both want to be the centre of attention and bicker over who’s No 1! Although I love the humans I’m not quite as loyal, if you’ve got a carrot I’m happy to say hi J

2/. Sensible

Mules are just soooo sensible(some may say boring!) compared to us short ears. FH says their self preservation is remarkable, The Mini got tangled up recently and instead of panicking like I would have done he checked that he couldn’t free himself, stood resolutely, didn’t panic, carried on eating and then bray-neighed to let the humans know what had happened!  Apparently mules were never used as cavalry mounts in the wars as they would never have been ‘persuaded’ to charge full speed in to battle, they were much better suited to carrying ammunition which would be safe as they would not plunge over the side of a cliff with their precious cargo or run off in to the sunset after panicking at a scary rock.  I still think being a shiny charger in full armour with a knight on my back would be fun!!

3/. Intelligent

The longer I spend with mules the more I realise they are the high achievers of the equine world.  This makes them very eager to do new things and ever so quick to pick up good (and bad) habits., it’s like being in the top set at school and having teacher’s pets all around you – ‘me Miss I know the answer!!’  Their ability to open gates, jump fences, undo doors or ‘entertain’ themselves is phenomenal, it would seem a bored mule is a destructive mule.  I’m happy because all of the stuff FH does with the long ears she also does with me, some days I can’t keep up, what’s wrong with a snooze in the sun??

4/. Hardy

Now I’m a hardy little Shetland pony, probably the hardiest of all the short ears but it would seem that I have nothing on mules.  They just don’t seem to injure themselves or get sick like short ears.  Their feet are like iron (I know I’ve felt them a number of times – ouch L).  It appears that they also live on fresh air (aka straw), FH feeds us all lots of straw to keep out tummies full but has to make sure that I get a little extra feed in the winter as I don’t quite have the super duper donkey metabolism that the long ears have inherited.  I also do not like eating wood like the long ears – there are limits!

5/. Empathy

Mules have definitely inherited empathy from their donkey Dads.  Somehow they seem to ‘know’ when it’s a quiet or sad day and are good pals when you need them.  I’ve noticed that loud or nervous people don’t get on with my long eared pals, these folks are much better off coming to talk to me as I’m the calming influence. They can be incredibly gentle with children and adults who need a little extra care and I am always amazed at how they seem to know that someone just needs to stroke them or that their hands are too small to hold the carrot safely, and yet put a stranger in that they don’t like and they are fire breathing monsters again.

6/. Fun

FH says that the mule is the original all terrain vehicle, point it up a hill that looks impossible and it’ll find a way (if it’s safe).  They are so much fun to be around,  no day is ever the same and I can’t imagine what life would be like living with short ears…. Peaceful, Quiet?  More like boring and lonely! 


I’m firmly on the I LOVE MULES side!  This short ear is very happy with his muley pals!  I wonder what the next chocolate out of the box will be?








Monday, 7 May 2012

What's on a Mini Mule's Birthday List?


Greetings Muleteers!  I'm a birthday Mini Mule today, I am a whole 7 years old!  So what did this impeccably behaved Mini get for his birthday?  Well there was a pear, a banana peel, a walk with the humans, some birthday visitors and even a birthday hat!  Let me tell you more about it.... 

I was rudely awoken by some nasty rain but luckily I was tucked up safe and warm in my stable with Ro-Land, this mini needs his beauty sleep you know!  I'm very lucky because I can pick whether I want to bed down with Ro-Land or Dragon, some days when I need some peace and quiet I favour Ro-Land and when I want some fire I pick Dragon ;-)

The sun eventually shone and the humans decided that I was allowed some lovely cow parsley - yum!  Then FH decided that I needed a party hat as it was my birthday so the indignity of it all..... she gave me a tiara made of it. I know it's my birthday but I think this is a little unfair!  I am a mature mule now you know.... hehe I did get to eat it afterwards though!

The excitement didn't stop there either!  Imagine my delight when not one but two short eared lovelies came to my birthday party!!  Dragon is the one that normally gets all the attention but today it was my turn to greet the girls as they arrived, I wonder if they like my ears?
So the beautiful new short ears stayed for a little while and tried out the 'treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen' routine on me by trying to nibble my nose - huh, they don't put me off!  

After a little snooze in the sun I was ready for my next birthday adventure, a walk and hedge picnic with FH!  Now don't tell anyone but I love it when I get her all to myself.  Dragon thinks that she is No 1 mule as she gets to go riding with FH, you see I KNOW I'm No. 1 mule because FH tells me all the time, I do try to save everyone's feelings though as bragging is not a nice trait as FH keeps telling me.  

So off we pottered up the lane, I love looking at all the different plants and checking out what I would like to eat next, it's a veritable 'All You Can Eat Mule Buffet!
























Well muleteers it was time for this mini to potter home eventually, my tummy was suitably full of lots of lovely hogweed, cow parsley, brambles and grass and Dragon was doing her best impression of a 'Hoarse Horse' (she doesn't have such a mulificent bray neigh as me but I still love her) calling me home.

The day was rounded off by a lovely squishy pear and a tasty banana peel, what a lovely birthday, my birthday wish is lots more walks with FH and an opportunity to sample every plant in the hedgerow - I'll keep you posted on my progress!

Sunday, 6 May 2012

Sunshine, Splashes and Picnics

Greetings muleteers!  Callie here.  Well what a lovely day I've had :-)  The sun has had his hat on again and we're home for the weekend so the humans are always here to answer our every whim!  FH appeared this morning, still half asleep she arrived with my mule attire in tow which can only mean good things.

I'm ready for the off!
I patiently waited while she sorted out my attire and made sure it all fitted snugly without pinching. It does take quite a while and I do fidget a little but when it's done I'm ready to roll.  And then who's this?  One of my very favourite people... it's Smiley Human.  Hooray we're all off out to play!

We went on a new route today, I'm in training for a mule marathon (well I'd like to be anyway!) so we did a 8 mile round trip.  We went on some great mule terrain.  This is a bridleway that local horses dare not tread but not this mule, I eat rocks for a living - and look NO SHOES!! 

We went for a splash in the local stream which was great fun.  I quite fancied a little paddle maybe with a roll too but alas Smiley Human wouldn't let me....

No rolling in the stream allowed

So off we went, I spy a mule mountain in the distance!  Yippee!

Onwards and upwards, I spy a mule moutain
Eventually it was time to drop off Smiley Human at home, hope I see her again soon!

Then it was time for Female Human (FH) to take the reins! She likes to talk.... A LOT!  I learnt lots about the local wildlife and also had to stand and listen while she chatted to most of the local neighbourhood.  I guess it was okay though as she was mainly talking about my mulificence.

Eventually we were home after quite a trek, FH looks very pleased with herself, a likely story as I carried her half the way home!


FH said I had been an extra good muletta so I got to have a hedge picnic to celebrate my return home :-)


Well muleteers it's time for me to have a snooze as I am a little tired after my busy day.  I'm dreaming of competing in mule marathons, sounds like great fun :-)

Friday, 4 May 2012

A Flying Visit to Muleteer HQ

Lovely snoozing in the sun!
Greetings Muleteers!  Roller Polar here today.  Well what a nice day I've been having, lots of snoozing in the sun, scratching with The Mini and a little snack attack of grass this afternoon, my perfect day!

I have to tell you about the excitement of the week; no it's not Dragon's mountaineering or The Mini's new fashionable attire.... It's much more exciting... we have a new member of the gang!  We have no idea how long he'll stay but we're always excited to meet new friends :-)  Our visitor arrived on Monday after a very bad storm on Sunday and has stayed all week so we are getting used to having him around.


Our latest member of Muleteer HQ is a pigeon!  FH tells us that this is not just any pigeon but he is an amazing athlete (just like me, remember I'm in training for the Shetland Pony Grand National.....), he's a racing pigeon!  FH thinks he was blown off course in the storm and he seems to have lost some of his magnificent tail feathers so he's not flying too well.... I can't imagine how awful it would be if someone trimmed my magnificent mane.






I'm so excited to have a new pal, he comes every day and sits on the roof of our stables and stays all day scratching around on the yard for all the fallen scraps from our straw.

Spot the pigeon!


Peck, peck, where's the barley?
When FH gets home she gives him the bits from the floor in the feed store as his favourite food is the barley grains that fall out of our straw, FH says he can definitely stay as we're not allowed to eat these bits but he loves them as you can see!

He seems very friendly and hangs around with the gang and even seems to have Catanian figured out, when I was philosophising for a while I watching her trying to stalk him - fat chance, he flew off every time.... hehehe sometimes she's not always the quickest! She's given up trying now and seems to just like watching him :-)

Our Granny visited earlier in the week and had to come and meet the new addition, we were a little jealous as normally she spends her time cooing over us 'big ones' but not then she was firmly fixed on pigeon and it seems she has named him.....  His new name is Pie!  Apparently Pie is a very apt name for a pigeon.  FH laughed a lot and said there was irony in that name, I need to think about this for a while......




So Pie is hopefully here to stay as long as he needs to, he is not our first racing pigeon resident, we once had a friend called Pat who recovered with us and then flew home to Ireland.  Maybe Pie will stay a while, we're happy to have him!  I just have one concern....

You see the straw has a habit of getting stuck in my beautiful mane and sometimes there are even bits of barley, I really hope Pie doesn't think that I am a walking Pigeon Diner, oh the indignity of it!

This is not a Pigeon Diner!

Good night muleteers!  Sweet Dreams and remember a bird in the hoof is worth two in the tree.... or something like that????

Pie wishes you sweet dreams, he is happy to have landed in the alternate universe that is Muleteer HQ!

Thursday, 3 May 2012

Mountain Mule

Greetings Muleteers!  Callie here!  Today I am having a very well earned rest and having a snooze in the sun because I had a very busy evening.  The sun shone all day and I did my best to pack in the grass as much as I could and then FH appeared with saddle in tow which could only mean one thing - yippeee!

I was extra pleased because from out of nowhere arrived My Heroine and her human.  We were all going on a jolly outing.  I had my best catwalk stride on and FH could be heard chuckling that I was a mule on a mission.  But yuck we found clouds of midges up the lane who kept trying to bite my face and body - I hate midges!  So I had a good old shake and tested FHs stickability and dislodged as many as I could, I'm pleased to report FH managed to stay on! 

Off we set across the fields at 'mule on a mission' pace, suddenly I got the feeling I was being watched!  I deployed my ear antennae and discovered the culprits - cows and their calves!  Well that was interesting, they seemed very keen on looking at my mulificent ears so I gave them a quick ear wave and passed on by, one of them even tried to follow us!!

Now we were in uncharted territory heading up a track that's 'Made for Mules', huge granite rocks and gravel with water running down, I was in my element, mountain goats move over this is Mule Terrain!  Even My Heroine had to walk fast to keep up with me.  Eventually the track came to an end where there was a gate, some naughty human had very inconveniently put the latch very low so FH couldn't reach it so off she jumped and I had a snatch of grass.... but wait what's up there?
Time for a quick munch....
So being a Mountain Mule I decided to climb the sheer bank about 2 metres high and investigate the grass at the top!  FH went red in the face and puzzled how to get me down?  Easy!! 
What goes up must come down

After a quick munch I manoeuvred downwards off the bank whilst Calm Human laughed and took pictures!
Oh well it was worth getting down because then we went somewhere amazing!  We went out of the gate on were on the very wide open Mule Moor.  There were cattle and sheep and we could see for miles and miles.  It was all very exciting and I think this might be my very favourite place. 

Pioneering mule!

This mule has found her calling in life.... the Mule Moor looks like a great place to explore more, when are we going again??

Sunday, 29 April 2012

Matriarchal Mule

Greetings Muleteers!  A very damp Callie here!  Oh dear the rain has descended upon us again.... I can't bring myself to venture out of my mule palace, it is wet, windy and cold :-(

FH and I managed a small window yesterday without rain (even though it was very windy!) to go out with My Heroine and Calm Human, we had sooo much fun, we wandered around the lanes so that I could check out the happenings in the local area, whose sheep are where, what is in the local dustbins and how much water is flowing in the drains (lots!!), I also managed to meet the 4 o'clock train which as an avid trainspotter made my day.  I've never got so close to one and FH was very pleased with me standing within a few metres of it thundering above my head - I was very exciting to see the carriages going past and tried waving with my ears!  Alas there were no more trains so we had to motor on back up the hill, when we got home and it was time to say goodbye to My Heroine I had a little 'mule moment'.  Why should I have to go home first, I wanted to carry on further, it was not time to go home to baby sitting duty yet!

Which brings me to the real subject of my post....  FH has said that I am turning in to Matriarchal Mule.  Now I'm not too averse to this title as the definition is:


1. A woman who rules a family, clan, or tribe.
2. A woman who dominates a group or an activity.
3. A highly respected woman who is a mother.


Now best not tell The Mini as I think he would certainly have something to say about numbers 1 and 2...  You see being Matriarchal Mule is all very well and good but it does come with some drawbacks.  On Saturday morning I had to babysit Ro-Land on his hike back to the mule palace, he walks soooo slowly, I had to keep stopping and starting but as FH wanted to walk us both at once I had to be extra specially good, no pulling on the rope, no picnicking and definitely no trotting, otherwise my mini friend wouldn't keep up!

The other downsides are that I am always 'on guard'  when the little ones decide to sleep I have to stand guard, they are so small that even a gust of wind might get them and as for those nasty dogs that we sometimes see well they're nearly as big as Roller Polar.


It seems that the little ones also seem to think the best place to be is by my side so I even have to share my haynet, and my stable, this morning all three of us were squashed in - we're aiming for the record of how many minis and mules you can fit in a one mule stable, theirs was open for them but no they wanted to just be with me, well can you blame them?

It is a lot to live up to, the boys are always checking out my beauty and sometimes I feel like I have two minis on my apron strings!

I am also the dispenser of scratches and massages, these boys know that I can reach the parts that they can't, sadly they can't scratch my back for me so I have to ask FH nicely to do that for me.



However...... there are plenty of good points of being Matriarchal Mule!  These two extras from Mullivers Travels are my very own gang and I have not one but two boys to flutter my eyelashes at (3 if you count MH who is very won over by my good looks!).  They're not too difficult to look after I guess, despite their size they are quietly tough and The Mini always joins in the guarding duties.  Besides it is always nice to be somewhere that you're appreciated and I sure feel like that here!  There's no place like home with your very own family :-)

Til next time muleteers, I'm going to be dreaming about some sunshine, I've heard Italy is nice at this time of year??

Thursday, 26 April 2012

Desert Animals Do Not 'Do' Downpours

Dearest muleteers I have a complaint to make and it's a very big one!  What have you all done to the weather??  Do you not know that us desert animals DO NOT DO DOWNPOURS!

For the last two days I have been most upset as I have been made to curtail my grazing activities because of this terrible weather you have ordered.  Now I have heard that most of this damp isle is in drought but really??? How can this be???  Never have I heard such a ridiculous statement!

I don't 'do' damp...

Over the last 48 hours I have had to contend with the following:

1/. Pouring rain in volumes that have no right to be seen in a country in drought!
2/. Thunder and lightning (I hide behind Dragon as she will get struck first, her ears are the highest....)
3/. Hail (ouch)
4/. Gales (it's just not right to have wind blowing up your botty... it should be the other way around, hehe)
5/. Mud glorious blooming mud (It has no place in a mule's wardrobe)
6/. A grumpy Dragon, she has even been rugged up which is unusual as she normally hates this especially as the rug is not pink!
7/. A stupidly happy Ro-Land who is oblivious to bad weather and is merrily eating all the grass that Dragon and I are too busy sheltering to eat, he is a Shetland Pony you know (yawn as he keeps telling us)

Us desert animals just don't do rain, we are not waterproof and do not possess the stupidly thick coat that Ro-Land does for just such eventualities, I am officially a rather grumpy mule today :-(

So please muleteers I implore you start doing a dance for sunshine, this poor mini mule can't take much more.....  Tonight I will be talking to FH about finding me a special little mini mule rug just for me :-)

I am dreaming of a snooze in the sun....